Sex with the X

You just happen to be at the mall or at that concert that you have been dying to go to. Your getting your shopping done or you are grooving to the music when all of a sudden you bump into someone. You get your bearings and realize that the eyes you are gazing into are very familiar. They belong to your ex. You're not with your woman/man and she/he's not with anyone at that time so you two decide to catch up on things because its been a minute since the pain has subsided and you can now talk to each other without tissue or medication.

You start up conversation and this leads to getting a bite to eat. You feel comfortable. Willing to forget the past transgressions and the more you eat and talk and drink you think this feels right and you loosen up. One thing leads to another and before you know it... you're having sex with your ex. What is it that is so appealing about sleeping with your ex. I mean it can't be all equipment and technique (Ok it can, but that would be real shallow ). Maybe it is the familiarity. They know your body. They made you feel special at one time or they touched spots on you or in you that you didn't even know were there.

I have had this happen to me in my past. The woman that I stepped back to was not good for me but damn she was good. When we were together she made me crazy but the sex was phenomenal and I loved (lusted for) her deeply. I know I was wrong but I carried feelings for her even into my next relationship and when the opportunity presented itself again for us to be together again we both took it. It didn't matter that I was in that relationship or that she had a man. Our need of each other was too great and as doggish as it may seem we acted on it.

Her skin was so soft and her body moved in sync with mine. The way she kissed me was incredible. The chemistry we still had for each other could not be denied. It was like going back home after being gone for so long. It just felt right. That feeling of warm and fuzzy as we touched our warm and fuzzies together was something that as a human being was so hard to deny myself. After the love making was over there was the regret. I realized that she was still the same woman that I had to leave and I had to tell the woman I was with what had transpired (That conversation went real well...yeah right).

I guess we as human beings want to feel good and if that source of pleasure comes from a former source of pain then that becomes irrelevant at the time as long as that need is met. I can not offer a concrete reason why sex with the ex was so appealing to some. I think for me it satisfied a need that I had at that time and in some instance brought a certain amount of (I hate this word) closure. As I have gotten older I realize that the tempation is just not worth it. The person that left you or that you left is still always beneath the surface of that pleasure they can bring you. It doesn't matter if they brought you multiple orgasms, made you feel like you were a god/goddess or made your toes curl in knots at one time. The end result is if that if they have not changed since your break up, they also know how to push your buttons and break your heart.

This is just one of the many pills in my bottle. Can you swallow it?

S.L.