Who do you think you are? That's a good question. Let me answer that for you in this brief blog. Foremost, I'm the person that you came to seeking advice. You were directed to me by someone who I may have helped along the way. Like it or not the answers for those that have seeked my council are not from Winchell's Donuts nor Dolly Madison. In other words it will not be sugar coated or sweet all the time. I am honest with those that seek my advice almost to a fault but I am not brutal. If you are making poor life choices when it comes to your relationships then I will bring those choices to your attention and offer a bit of instruction how to turn that situation around. People don't make poor choices because of a mental deficiency. Most times it is a heart deficiency. Too much emotion and not enough thinking is involved. Feelings have to be boxed up and logic unpacked.
Secondly I'm a realist, If you are in a bad relationship, I will not tell you to leave that person because you still have strong emotional ties. What I will tell you is when you've had enough of what has made you unhappy so far then no one will have to tell you to leave. You will depart on your own. What I do is reenforce the beliefs in your good qualities and present the possibilities to you of a brighter future once you have corrected the poor decisions that have brought you to this point. I won't enable your current behavior but will try to show you other ways of thinking.
Thirdly I prefer to consider myself a life coach. I have studied psychology and sociology but I am neither a psychologist nor a sociologist. The majority of us know that most life coaches do not have degrees. What they do possess is life experience that they share with others and offer guidance. This guidance comes from years of observation, trial and error and obtaining wisdom from thier own pain and suffering, as well as keeping the wisdom they obtained from listening to others wiser than themselves. I don't usually offer advice but mainly instructions when asked.
Most days I can be found observing people (mainly couples) on my lunch break. I watch them while they interact with one another. I see them laugh together, lie to one another, and (most times) quietly argue so a scene is not made. I can usually tell which of these two people is into the other more by thier body language. Discern what troubles they are having from tidbits of conversations I hear. I take it all in in order to be a better man in my present relationship. Also, what I witness, assists me to help others when they ask for instructions. My advice is far from perfect and is not cookie cutter. What may help one person or couple will not assist another in the least. I am only here to help shed a little bit of light into the darkness that you feel is around you.
Thses are a few of the roles of who I am.
S.L.
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